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Sai Baba said that Krishna waited 70 years for the moment on the eve
of the great war, when Arjuna fell to his knees in despondency and turned
to Krishna, who was his brother-in-law and dearest buddy at the time,
but who Arjuna now recognized as the divinity. Arjuna cried out, "Lord,
Help me! I'm confused. I don't know what to do." That's when the
Bhagavad Gita came. In my own case, Spirit waited until I was in a hopeless
situation in a plane that I was flying, that was coming apart in an incredible
storm and running out of fuel, when I cried out, "God help me! I
don't want to die!." The call was answered immediately and I was
saved physically and spiritually. I was brought to India and the door
was opened to everything in the whole universe. With Yaani, Spirit waited
until she was threatened with death before revealing the truth to her.
Spirit waits for the call. It is ever eager to come but It will not circumvent
your free will; so It waits for the invitation. It is the mother of mothers.
It will come running to take you in Its arms as soon as you call out to
It.
Then why do these stories always have such a dramatic extremis character
to them? Why do I have to be near death before I call out and Spirit responds?
Why does Spirit wait for Yaani to be threatened with death and be horribly
abused before It responds, and in a way totally different then asked for.
She wanted God to save her body. She was shown that she was not her body,
that instead she was invincible, invulnerable, she could not be threatened.
She was the love of God in its entirety; there was no force anywhere in
the universe that could oppose her mind or threaten her. So if that great
realization is available to us any time, how come we don't call out right
now but wait for that extreme situation? The reason will surprise you.
At the surface of consciousness we fear death, but below in the subconscious
where the ego has taken up residence, we are attracted to death. We welcome
death because it puts the lie to any idea of eternal life, of oneness
with everything and everyone. Death proves we're separate. It supports
our self-image and our separation from God. Similarly, at the conscious
level we want to be loved and so when we hear of a god-man, the divine
in human form, we rush there yearning to experience his love. But, hopefully,
not too much love. For at the subconscious level our terror is not of
death but of God's love, for we know it will annihilate us, it will dissolve
our separate self and snuff out our individuality. So, our attraction
to Sai Baba quickly turns to seeking an interview which would serve as
self-verification, and would hopefully get him to solve our individual
problems and reinforce our specialness.
Only when death is staring us directly in the eye and we're facing physical
annihilation, which we see as total dissolution of our self, will we take
a chance on dissolution at God's Hands, and call out to Him. But, why
wait? Eventually, you yourself will create a scenario in which you have
no choice but to appeal to God. You'll make a rapist and install him in
the Sai Center, or you'll create some other 'life'-threatening incident
for yourself. It may be a great story, but it's stupid. To the ego the
story may be foolproof but only because by embracing the ego you have
become a fool and will not recognize the insidious plot that you yourself
have concocted. The story is foolproof, but it is not God proof. It won't
work because you are not a fool; you are one with God. And God is pure
love and will not let you get lost in a nightmare.
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